Message from Cecil Murphey

As many of you know, on the morning of February 27, 2007 Cecil Murphey lost his house to a fire. His he, his wife and his daughter were able to escape but his son-in-law was killed during the fire.

God seems to have performed miracle after miracle since that fire. His hard drive was recovered, most of his important papers (passport etc) were recovered and the least damaged of all the rooms was Cec's office. His church, his community and writers from around the world have poured out their hearts in prayer and opened their wallets to help Cec and his family out until the insurance money comes through. I thought this particular paragraph from an email Cec sent was a great example of where this writer's heart continues to reside:
From an email sent 3/6/07 by Cecil "Cec" Murhpey
"For a long time I sat by myself and watched the fire fighters try to put out the fire. In the midst of that, the words of Job 2:10 came to me. Job's wife saw all the chaos and loss and told her husband to curse God and die. He replied, `We have received good from the hand of the Lord. Shall we not also receive evil?' As that verse filled my mind, I heard myself say, `Who am I to feel I should be exempt?' "

Of course the greatest loss to this family is Alan Hege, Cec's son-in-law. Please continue to pray for the family and for Cec's daughter, C-C (Cecile) who is obviously mourning the loss of her dear husband.

Blogger-Blogspot

It seems that blogspot has finally worked out some of the kinks in its new system and I am once again able to post items as needed.

Stay tuned for more writing opportunities and writing info.

NEW EMAIL ADDRESS:
louisedumont@gmail.com

Louise Bergmann DuMont
Author and Speaker
Facilitator of the NJCWG
www.louisedumont.com
www.cafemochalight.blogspot.com

EASTER

Easter Sunday is April 8.
Our next meeting would have been on April 7.
Due to the proximity of the two dates, we will NOT have a meeting on April 7.

THE NEXT MEETNG
OF THE NJCWG IS
Saturday, MAY 5, 2007

Here is the second hand-out from our 3/3/07 Meeting

The Query / Cover Letter
Required Elements
Presented to the NJCWG Group on 3/3/07
by Louise Bergmann DuMont

THE HOOK (Pitch)
Your first line should hook the reader’s attention. It must demonstrate that you can write effectively, and that you understand the publication’s market.

Possibilities
1. Show a problem and how you solved it. (Carpenter ants will destroy your home but not everyone wants to use toxic chemicals to exterminate them. I recently used an earth friendly system to rid…)
2. Share information that is not common knowledge or show why your reader needs to know what you are writing about. (The mothers of 2003 are no longer surrounded by a previous generation of women who will mentor them in child rearing. What do these women do when their newborns come down with diaper rash or their toddlers throw their first temper tantrum? They often turn their peers. I have written an article that explains how young mothers can start their own support groups.)
3. Ask a question. (Did you know…?, What would you do if…?, Have you ever wondered…?)
4. Use a personal anecdotal approach. (When my five year old son, Jason, was diagnosed with leukemia…)
5. Grab the reader’s attention. (As my grip slipped from its slender hold on the mountain’s ridge I wondered if my life would truly flash before my eyes when I fell from its heights…)

Avoid
1. Personal Introductions (Hi, my name is…)
2. Sucking Up (I just LOVE your magazine and have subscribed for 20 years)
3. Sympathy Ploy (I really need the money that this article will bring because…)
4. Too Humble / Unprofessional (I’ve never been published before… I know you’ve probably got other articles better than mine but…)
5. Too Proud (I am a highly experience professional… My article would be perfect for your magazine because…) Skip words like wonderful, perfect, fascinating, etc when referring to your work. Let the editor decide for himself how good your work is based on the writing.
6. God Sent (God told me…) When God tells the editor to publish your work, THEN he’ll listen.

THE BODY
Once you have the editor hooked, pitch your idea with solid information. This should include a working title, a word count, the target audience, and a brief summary of the article. The actual pitch is often the first line of the body. The longer the article the more detailed the body. Doing a point by point outline of your intended article (for you, not for the editor) will make sure you include the important information when writing this section. If you are writing a cover letter (not a query), this information section will be no longer than a few lines.

Example: I’d like to offer you a 1,500 word article entitled “Dressing the Mother of the Groom.” This article describes the ordeal of a slightly plump, jeans and T-shirt mom who sets out to purchase the perfect formal gown. Its target audience is every woman who has experienced the stress of trying to find the ultimate dress for her special occasion. It is a light-hearted look at a society that highly prizes the petite and fit forms of youth…a society that often leaves the average woman with less than sophisticated choices in the dressing room.

THE CREDENTIALS
Even if you’ve never been published, you must address the issue of your credentials. The editor wants to know why YOU are the best person to write the article you have proposed. This is usually the last or next to last paragraph.

Some things you could/should list.

 Professional experience pertinent to the subject you are writing about
 Academic degrees or training pertinent to the subject you are writing about
 Teaching experience pertinent to the subject you are writing about
 Personal experience pertinent to the subject you are writing about
 Writing experience – ANY writing experience
 Interviews with experts (if you don’t have expertise in the area you are writing about this is an excellent way of demonstrating that you know how to GET the information you need)

THE CLOSE
“Thank you very much…” – plus one last nudge.

Example: Thank you for taking the time to review my query. If you would like to see my article, I could have it on your desk within two weeks of receiving notice from you. I am looking forward to your response.

GENERAL FORMAT
 Create a nice, clean looking letterhead that includes your name, address, phone number and email address.
 Business Style (Block or Modified Block Style with spaces between paragraphs)
 Formal Salutation (Dear Mr. Robert Rowe or Ms. Roberta Rowe – Not Dear Bob or Bobbie)
 Clean copy.
 Proofread and corrected copy.
 Quality paper – Use at least 20-lb bond paper in white, linen or parchment – no colors
 Enclose a SASE (self-addressed stamped envelope). Don’t use ‘insert’ envelopes (A4, A6, etc); instead fold a full-size business envelope (#10) in thirds and send that. If you are sending a full manuscript with the cover letter and you would like both returned, make sure the envelope is large enough that the manuscript is not folded.
 Send clips only IF the guidelines request them.

Handout from the 3/3/07 Mtg

Here is the first hand-out from our 3/3/07 Meeting

Tantalizing Sentences, Tempting Paragraphs
Presented to the NJCWG on 03/03/07
by Louise Bergmann DuMont

When you gather tantalizing sentences they soon create tempting paragraphs. These will quickly lift your writing above other manuscripts and you'll soar toward publication

ADD A TOUCH OF THE UNUSUAL
Carefully research and study your subject matter. Know what you want to say and how you are going to say it. The essence of writing an interesting article is simplicity… but to make your writing stand out, you must add a touch of the unusual. The more you know about your subject, the more likely you will be able to interject something that the reader does not already know.

WORDS THAT FLOW, SMOOTH SENTENCES
Examine your sentences and paragraphs to ensure that the words flow smoothly. A paragraph should deal with ONE (and ONLY one) idea. This idea is developed through sentences that logically advance the point you are trying to make. Each sentence should add meaning or develop the story (plot). Check, recheck and then check again for logic.

A new author's brain fairly bursts with plot twists and character information. If the author does not pass this information on to the reader in a logical fashion, the reader doesn't "get" the words. Imagine a river filled with small smooth stones. The water gently ripples over the stones but continues forward without much trouble. Whirlpools are like breaches of information. They spin the reader around and around while he tries to find a way to move on. Dams are like too much information. They stall the reader as maneuvers around the mass to get through the story.

Logical, linear sentences that vary in length but provide the appropriate information are like a babbling brook. There is a flow that is almost musical in quality.

ACTIVE LANGUAGE "POPS"
Passive writing is boring to read. Active verbs and strong nouns create friction and energy. They are the difference between a flat, warm cola on a hot day, and freshly opened bottle of sparkling champagne on New Year's Eve. Read good contemporary literature and it will "pop" with active voice.

WRITE USING YOUR OWN VOICE
If you haven't yet found your own voice, don't fret. The more you write, the more you'll realize what works and what doesn't. Practice writing the way some of the better contemporary writers do. You'll find you can not mimic some, but the voice of others will come easily. Concentrate on the "sound" of the words. Are you a forthright person - the first to arrive at every party? Or do you amble into a room fashionably late, waiting to see who else arrived first? Know your style, your writing will likely follow similar patterns.

VARY THE LENGTH OF YOUR SENTENCES
The length of a sentence can create drama, provoke tension or evoke mood. As a rule, sentences within a paragraph should vary. This helps to hold the reader's attention by allowing the reader to breathe, think and even ponder the thoughts you are presenting

Example (From Ursula Le Guin's The Earthsea Trilogy:
The boat rounded a short promontory, and he saw on the shore what he took for a moment to be a ruined fortress. It was a dragon. One black wing was bent under it and other stretched out vast across the sand and into the water, so that the come and go of the waves moved it a little to and fro in a mockery of flight. The long snake-body lay full length on the rock and sand. One foreleg was missing, the armor and flesh were torn from the great arch of the ribs and the belly was torn open, so that the sand for yards about was blackened with the poisoned dragon-blood. Yet the creature still lived. So great a life is in the dragons that only an equal power of wizardry can kill them swiftly. The green-gold eyes were open, and as the boat sailed by, the lean huge head moved a little, and with a rattling hiss, steam mixed with bloody spray shot from the nostrils

Lenten Poetry

I thought many of you might enjoy this message (and poetry) from fellow auther, Latayne C. Scott. Latayne. She is an award-winning author and poet who lives New Mexico and I've created a link to the site where you can read her poetry.
~~~~~~~~~~~
Since the Lenten season is one in which many people devote themselves to an even deepercommunion with the Lord, I'd like to offer my help through verse. Every couple of days I am posting on my website ( www.latayne.com )a new poem and devotional thought to anchor (and incite) our minds as we approach Good Friday and Easter.

Today's, for instance, builds on a little-known item from first-century history: the fact that when the Passover lambs were sacrificed in the temple, their blood flowed down a drain that emptied into the Kidron River, over which Jesus passed on His final visit to the Mt. of Olives.

Latayne C. Scott

New Jersey News

North Jersey Christian Writers Group (NJCWG) member Chris Sagona just happens to be the Assignment Editor for News 12. She is looking for any leads you might have for New Jersey stories.

In her words - "let people know that if they have ideas for features or better yet, for breaking news to please call or email me!"

Thanks!
Chris Sagona
Assignment Editor
News 12
732-346-3270 office
201-755-4149 cell
casagona@news12.com
chrissagona@gmail.com

Next Meeting

The next meeting of the NJCWG is this Saturday

SATURDAY, March 3, 2007

ANSWER #1 - Too Much Clutter

Over the next few weeks author Kathryn Porter going to answer many of your questions about clutter. The first question comes from a North Jersey Christian Writers Group member, Barbara.

Barbara is also the first winner of Kathryn's book TOO MUCH STUFF.

FROM BARBARA

QUESTION #1.
How do I organize my ideas for writing/speaking? I get great ideas, write them "someplace" & "everyplace". Even if I put them in the same place how can I find what I want? Should I file them by topic? Alphabetical? By Audience? Can it be cross referenced?

The thing to remember is that there is no one-size fits all when it comes to organizing. File them under a system that makes sense for you.

When you get into cross-referencing, you make more work for yourself. Keep it simple.

I file my ideas by using three subject notebooks. I like them because they easily travel anywhere. I don’t keep my notebooks forever. If I don’t use those ideas within a month after I fill the notebook, I toss the notebook and start a new one. If the idea is that good or if I’m that passionate about it, I create an outline on my computer for an article or book chapter. If the idea just sits in the notebook, it’s clutter.

I can picture some individuals gasping at the notion of tossing ideas in the trash. I’m hard core when it comes to de-cluttering. I don’t want to live in mediocrity surrounded by an ocean of ideas. I prefer to work with laser like precision by focusing on one project and completing it. In fact, I find that most of my ideas are directly related to whatever project I happen to be working on at the time. This is something that may come more naturally to you as you discover your bend as a writer.

For speaking, I have a different system. I write summaries and outlines for all my workshops and keep them in a folder on my computer. From time to time, I’ll open those folders, refine those workshops, and maybe swap them out on some of my promotional materials to keep things fresh.

There’s also software available to organize writing and speaking ideas. It will take time to input everything into the computer, but then you should be able to do searches by word or topic, depending on the software you choose. The only organizing software I recommend is the Paper Tiger. It’s not specific to writing, but it’s the best out there. For more information, please visit http://www.thepapertiger.com/.

Also, beware of working so much on ideas that you never actually pick a project and follow it through. That’s why I’m not that big on filing ideas—we just have so many of them that keeping track of them can be more of a project than we bargained for.

Sad News - Prayers Requested

This is a message I recently received from Deidre Knight (Cecil Murphy's agent).

~~~~~
Dear Friends

As many of you know, Cec Murphey's home burned to the ground yesterday morning, and his son-in-law was killed in the fire. Cec is loved by so many within the writing and publishing community, known as a mentor, friend, sponsor and prayer warrior. In the past twenty-four hours, the outpouring of love toward Cec and his family has been overwhelming and he is deeply touched by all the expressions of encouragement and support.

Stan and Carol Cottrell will be sharing their home with Cec and Shirley, beginning today. Stan and Carol live 1.5 miles from the former Murphey residence. They have a spare bedroom, private bath, and a room that is now designated as Cec's working office. This wonderful couple will keep the doors of their home open to Shirley and Cec for the short and long-term. Shirley and Cec will have free use of laundry and kitchen facilities as well as an open door to come and go as needed.

Today Carol will take Shirley shopping for personal items and clothing. Stan is taking Cec shopping for personal items, clothing, a new computer, a printer, and office supplies. Thank you for your contributions.

We are still working on funds to cover the following needs, and other needs that will arise.
· Desk and chair
· Book shelf· Lamp
· File folders, paper, dictionary, reference books
· Brief case
· Suit case for travels
· Desk clock
· Stereo system for office
· CDs (instrumental)
· Desk calendar
· BIBLE
· Memory book (for cards and notes from friends)

If you would like to make a contribution, please mail check to Deidre:
Deidre Knight
The Knight Agency
577 South Main Street
Madison, GA 30650

Cards and letters may be sent to:
Cec and Shirley Murphey
c/o Stan Cottrell
4619 West Hampton Drive
Tucker, GA 30084

Funeral arrangements for Cec's son-in-law have not been made yet. The cause of the fire has not been determined. Deidre Knight and I will try to keep you updated. In the meantime, we ask that you direct inquiries to: deidre.knight@knightagency or jancoates@suddenlink.net.

Cec and Shirley need some quiet time without the cell phone ringing constantly to sort things out, grieve, and make necessary business and personal decisions.

Thank you for your continued prayers and support for Cec and his family.
In Him,
Deidre

St. Catherine's Poetry/Art Exhbit

Next Weekend!

St. Catherine's
Photo, Art & Poetry Exhibition
March 2-4, 2007

March 2, 7:00-11:00
March 3, 6:00-11:00
March 4, 10:00-4:00

NJCWG member, Maude, has once again been invited to read her poetry and this year, Marilyn's grand-daughter (Carina) will have art work exhibited as well.

50% Disc - Delaware Christian Writers Conference

**Delaware Christian
Writers Conference**
April 19-21
University of Delaware
Newark, DE
24 Workshops
Writing Contests with cash prizes
Editorial appointments

http://www.delawarechristianwritersconference.com/

To sign up email johnriddle@sprintmail.com
==============================================
AND
for those of you who subscribe to SPIRIT-LED WRITER magazine there is a special (truly fantastic) deal!
**Special offer!**
Save 50% on the registration fee till Feb. 28.
**Pay only $295**
To Subscribe (its FREE) to the Spirit-Led Writer go their website http://spiritledwriter.com/index.html and put your info in the subscription box.
==============================================

Espresso For The Heart

My latest Espresso for the Heart column is now online at the Comfort Cafe.
Go to: http://comfortcafe.net/?p=552

Louise Bergmann DuMont
Author & Speaker

Over Used Modifiers

Overused Modifiers & Phrases
Presented to the NJCWG

by Louise Bergmann DuMont
2/3/07

Here are modifiers & phrases that can often be eliminated. Tossing these will tighten your work.

absolutely

active

actively

actual

actually

alleged

any

arguably

available

basically

both

careful

carefully

certain

certainly

comparative

comparatively

considerably

consistently

decidedly
deeply

definite

definitely

effective

eminent

eminently
especially

exactly

existing
eventually

fortunately

generally

erself

himself

hopefully

ideally

in fact

in general

in particular

in the future

in the past

indeed

inherently

inevitably

itself
madly

meaningful

meaningfully

namely

necessarily

needless to say

now

over time

overall

particular
particularly

per se

pretty

quite

rather

real

really

related

relatively

reportedly

respectively

so

so-called

somewhat

specific

themselves

total
totally
truly

unfortunately
utterly

very

whatever

Using Conflict to Create Drama

As usual, the February meeting of the NJCWG was packed with info for every writer. I am posting one of the handouts here.

Using Conflict to Create Drama
Presented to the NJCWG 2/3/07
by Louise Bergmann DuMont

Q: Do I really need conflict? Can't my characters all just get along?
A: Without conflict there is no story. Life without conflict is not 'real.'

Q: I have lots of action in my novel but I was told that there isn't enough conflict. Aren't conflict and action the same thing?
A: New writers often mistake the two. Conflict is not action but conflict is the reason most action occurs. Meaningless action scenes are not enough to carry a story.

Imagine a scene where one car chases another up and down the narrow San Francisco streets … but you (the reader) have no idea why they are doing this or who is in the two cars. Do you care about the chase? Now imagine a scene where a young child has been kidnapped. The father sees the child being abducted and initiates a chase through the same streets. All through the chase he must balance keeping up with the evasive car in front of him, with the safety of pedestrians, the safety of other drivers on the road, and the safety of the car that holds the kidnappers (because his child inside that car).

An action scene has no point and holds no interest without the insertion of conflict.

Q: If conflict is not the same as action, what IS conflict?
A: Conflict is when two forces are in opposition to each other. These forces can be emotional, mental, physical, spiritual, sociological, or elemental

Q: I've heard of Internal Conflict and Personal Conflict, but what are they and are there other kinds of conflict?
A: There are many kinds of conflict and they can be called many things. Below are a few kinds of conflict that have been grouped for the sake of explanation:

INTERNAL CONFLICT
Conflict with oneself. Inner turmoil. Moral dilemmas. Overcoming trauma. Psychological problems. Internal Conflict is not with other characters, though it can affect other characters. Internal Conflict comes across best when the reader feels they are in the mind of the character. This is because the reader can visualize the situation and they feel as if it was occurring to them..

PERSONAL CONFLICT
This is about inter-personal relations - conflict between two or more individuals. It is often between the hero and his friends or the hero and his lover(s). It does not involve larger issues like peer pressure or the rules of society, but rather, the problems the characters have relating one to another.

SOCIAL CONFLICT
Note: this is the conflict of choice.
Social Conflict can be between a parent and a child, between a doctor and a patient, between a hero and society, etc. Social Conflict occurs when you are dealing with issues that are larger than one-on-one relationships. Stories that deal with concepts like authority, injustice, persecution and assimilation are in the domain of the Social Conflict.

ELEMENTAL CONFLICT
Elemental Conflict is between man and his environment. The hero deals with a non-personal, elemental force of nature. It could be anything from a long dormant volcano (now spewing lava) threatening a troop of hiking boy scouts to a pack of run-amuck butterflies overtaking a mid-western state.

Q: What is the nature of conflict? Isn't a story about the characters?
A: Conflict is impersonal but a story's characters should not be. For example, people understand the concept of war, but they don’t see what it has to do with them unless your main characters convey their feelings and situation to the reader. That is when it becomes tangible.

Your reader must "feel" something when they read a scene. Lets take that war story scenario. People may be dying on every page of your manuscript but the war will seem abstract to your reader. All that changes when the reader "sees" the war through the eyes of the main character. When they watch a child die in the arms of the hero (as seen through the eyes of his fiancée) the reader is touched. They fee the pain the woman feels, they see the remorse she sees in the eyes of her hero, and they share the conflict that occurs when the nurse's peaceful ideals and the hero's duty to his country collide. Conflict becomes real when our characters bring us into the story's world through their conflicts.

Conflict needs meaning to be powerful. So the issues of the conflict must be important to the characters. When the characters are emotionally involved, the reader is emotionally involved. This happens if (and only if) the reader cares about the characters. How does an author make the reader care? By using universal truths to touch the reader.

When you’re writing a story about personal and/or social conflicts, you’re really pitting the will of your characters against each other. And through that use of will, the reader learns who they are and what they’re made of. In an internal conflict, the character's will is pitted against his or her innate nature. They may have a fear of heights and yet they go to the 81st floor of a building for job interview that will allow them to feed their family after being out of work for more than a year. In this case, the character battles their own nature to do something for the greater good.

Lack of internal conflict limits a character’s dimension. Single minded individuals are only common in bad fiction -- not in life. If you are human, you have conflict. According to scientists, reason and emotion are completely intertwined. When someone suffers brain damage to the emotion centers of the brain, they lose the ability to make logical decisions. We learn by our mistakes. If we did not fear negative repercussions, we would have no reason to restrain or re-train ourselves.

Q: So how do I do this? How do I create "good" conflict? Conflict where the reader cares about the characters?
A: To write a good story you need to know your character's fears, their needs and desires. Discover their emotional hot buttons and use other characters to push those conflict buttons. Conflict does not necessarily mean a grumbling hero, a glowering child or a defiant teen. Real conflict meant taking the hero’s (or heroine’s) worst fear, twisting it around, and then throwing it back at them at the worst possible moment and saying, “Think fast!”

Make your characters face their flaws and fears. Toss out pages filled with quiet stay-at-home evenings, long candle lit dinners, shopping, and sweet kisses. Fill your pages their worst fears come true and how they over came those fears. Confront your characters with hard choices - make them chose between good and evil. And for the sake of your reader, have them mess up occasionally before they triumph over the "big bad."

SpiritLedWriter

The latest issue of the SpiritLed Writer is on the web.

Articles:
Writing From Heartache: 7 Tips for Sharing Your Grief with Others
Down From the Mountain: 6 After-Conference Strategies That Work
Poetry Potpourri
The Pitfall of Preachy Prose
Nuggets for Personal Journaling
Polishing Your Prose
Conference Review: Online Writing Conference
Analyzing a Magazine
Inspired Romance
And so... so... SO... much more

Check it out today!
http://spiritledwriter.com/

Terry Whalin - Places to Visit

Terry Whalin has written more than 60 nonfiction books and has published in more than 50 magazines. He's been both an acquisitions editor and literary agent so he knows both sides of the story writing life. One of best works (in my opinion) is Book Proposals That $ell,
21 Secrets to Speed Your Success. Here are a few great places where you can soak up Terry Whalin's expert advice.

Blog: http://terrywhalin.blogspot.com/
Web: http://www.right-writing.com/index.html
Web: http://terrywhalin.com/

2007 Christian Writers' Market Guide Available

Christian Writers' Market Guide 2007

I will have 10 copies of the 2007 Christian Writers' Market Guide for sale at our February meeting. You may purchase it for only $22.00 on a first come - first serve basis. The reason I get these at such a good price is because I've had a standing order with Sally Stuart for quite a number of years. I only ten copies to make sure to get yours right away. Even the Amazon ($23.99) and CBD ($24.99) prices are higher than this - and with them you have to pay shipping.

If you want to be a published writer this year, you need the 2007 Christian Writers' Market Guide.
If you only have the money to buy one writing book this year - you need the 2007 Christian Writers' Market Guide.
If God is calling you out of your comfort zone to write for HIM this year - you need the 2007 Christian Writers' Market Guide.

List Price $34.99
YOUR PRICE - $22.00

NJCWG Meeting

The NJCWG has loads of things to look forward to in 2007. The first item on our list is Kathryn Porter's blog tour. Kathryn is looking for "how do I declutter my writing life" questions. The five best questions will be answered on the blog. One name will be drawn from those among those who submitted questions. The winner will receive a copy of her latest book. Please get those questions in now. (See previous blog posts on how to enter your questions.)

A second book will be offered to one person attending February's meeting (see below) -- so you have two chances to win!

The topic of this month's teaching - Using Conflict to Create Drama

NEXT MEETING of the NJCWG
Saturday, February 3, 2007
2:30-4:30 p.m.
Ringwood Baptist Church
30 Carletondale Road
Ringwood, NJ 07456

Blog Tour - Kathryn Porter

Today is the day we start our blog tour with author, speaker and Declutter Queen, Kathryn Porter.

We could use a few more questions from members of our group. If you have any questions on decluttering your writer's life - send them to me (njcwg.dumont@gmail.com) ASAP. We'll take the last questions on February 9 and I will post them along the way.

Louise Bergmann DuMont
Author & Speaker